Whole
by supernaturalsammy67
Summary: Sam : only this is Sam, whole. Season 6. Post 6x07.


**Because this is what I want...and Phx did a beautiful fic called 'Beating Hearts and Missing Soul' which spurred this on, which was a bloody beautiful fic- the good kinda hurt.**

**Also inspired by the 6x07 30 second promo. Bloody BRILLIANT! Well cushty!**

**For a prompt: An easy fix to Sam this season.**

**Summary: Sam : only this is **_**Sam, **_**whole. Season 6. Post 6x07.**

**Warning: Spoilers! Language!**

**Disclaimer: My god! I don't own them! I wished I did, this season has so much angst to come and I kinda feel like a wraith taking it all on. Oh well! Creepy me- needed to get this out and explore season 6 a little, get in Sam's head.**

**One shot.**

"Dean, what are you doing?"

It was that _Sammy-_petulant voice nagging and _asking, _and being 5 years old all over again.

"Shut up" Dean growled, turning away from Sam's emotionless eyes looking at Dean like he should _feel _something, pretending again.

"I don't know what's wrong with me, I've told you"

Dean stared, narrowed his eyes at his _brother._

He didn't know if he should be leaving Sam tied to that chair and walking out of the hotel forever, never looking back because his Sam was gone, or find whatever did _this, _whatever took Sam away from being _Sam_ and _fix _him.

"Yeah, and you lied to me for months too"

Sam sighed, his head hanging low on is chest. "I've tried looking for what's wrong, what's missing from me...I didn't find anything Dean"

There was a flutter like paper in the room and Dean stood straighter facing Sam.

"You didn't have an angel helping you then"

Sam's head came up, frowning like a robot being asked to fall in love and glanced to Castiel stood by Dean's side.

"Sam, you feel...different, I can't sense you"

Dean's eyes glanced downwards, shadowed. "Check him" He whispered, tight throat.

The angel stood forward, belt in his hand. "Bite down on this, it will be unpleasant for you"

Sam barely had time to ask when the leather fit between his teeth and Castiel's hand sunk into his chest with searing pain.

He may not feel any emotion but he screamed like he was being tortured in Hell all over again.

Dean stiffened, Sam's neck straining as he screamed, body shaking as Cas moved his hand, his eyes shining a piercing blue.

Castiel stopped, frowning, his hand still as his eyes closed and the belt dropped with a clang from Sam's mouth as he panted.

"Nggh..."

The arm tilted and Sam threw his head back, his eyes squeezed shut, mouth open in silent scream.

As Castiel moved to dig deeper Sam jerked, a blinding light breaking under Castiel's hand and Dean had to turn away from the heat he felt.

He heard Sam's raw scream and when he opened his eyes again Sam was...

"STOP! AAH STOP STOP IT PLEASE...Dean! God make it...sto-aahh"

Before Dean knew what he was doing, something made his cogs work, his brain fire, his body move on an impulse he'd almost forgotten.

Dean grabbed Cas and pulled him back, releasing Sam as he hung forward, limp and breathing gasping breaths.

"Dean- I had not-"

"I know..." Dean murmured, his eyes only on Sam. The top of his head as he groaned and lifted his eyes to meet Dean...

They were...

Heartbreakingly human...and painful and glazed and hurting and teary and Sam blinked, squeezing them looking at Dean with so much pain.

"Sammy..." Dean hoped.

"Dean" Sam hitched. "Help me..."

Rushing forward, he cut the ropes, caught Sam as he fell forward, a choke on his lips when Dean held him, Sam's arms coming round to claw a hold on Dean.

Dean felt Sam shaking in his hold, the tremours that ran under his skin.

"Thank you Cas" Dean breathed.

"I did not fix your brother Dean...but I can feel him now"

Dean blinked, "But the light-he's _different _Cas-" 

"There was no light Dean" The angel said calmly. "I was searching for a soul when you stopped me"

Dean looked down to the man he was holding.

"Everything hurts...I-I can't stop _feeling _Dean...ngh...make it stop"

Dean looked down...and saw his little brother.

"It's okay Sammy...I'm right here...I'm right here, I gotcha"

"I wish I couldn't feel at all" Sam shook.

Maybe...Dean thought, maybe it was better before for Sam not to feel this pain, not to remember hell every waking moment but a little part of him, a little selfish part was happy Sam was _Sam _again, and _his _little brother.

Whole.

**Well, that lost it's moment I was imagining...anyway, the muse has packed and it looks like it's sticking to...this draft. **

**Thanks for reading!**


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